Plus-Sized Confidence

20130119-211411.jpg

Last week, I read a blog post called How to Date a Fat Girl. Half way through reading it, I stopped and gasped into a silent room. My whole body had a reaction to what I was reading. I’ve taken some time to assess the pieces and my reaction and it really boils down to a few things.

I have always seen myself as an attractive person.
At 50 pounds lighter, 30 pounds heavier or my weight right now, I’ve always thought of myself as an attractive person. Call me vain. Call me petty. Call me whatever you want.

I’m a smart, sassy, confident girl. Yes, my pants may be bigger than yours, but that does not make me doubt my ability to light up a room.

I was married in a size 14 dress, does that make my husband a Chubby Chaser? I like big tattooed men with facial hair. Does this make me a Beard Chaser a Muscle Chaser?

Is there a derogatory term for men (or women) who like underweight women? Stick Chaser perhaps. Oh right, these labels only exists for overweight women because God forbid anyone finds us attractive. God forbid we see ourselves as attractive.

Yes, we can blame these stereotypes on society’s view of women and misogyny. We can blame it on a lot of external factors. But, what about our internal factors?

Who told you that you are unattractive? Who told you there is no way a man (or woman) would ever be attracted to you? Who told you to question peoples motives and think the worst? Chances are, these are things you say to yourself. Are you still talking to yourself like this? Well, it’s time to stop.

It sounds cliche, but the most important thing you wear everyday is confidence.

Guys, you want to learn how to date a fat girl, or any girl for that matter? Treat her like the amazing person she is. Period.

Girls, you want to feel attractive? Treat yourself like the amazing person you are. Period.

Maybe I am a dreamer, but this really shouldn’t be a hard concept to grasp.
Photo from Mind Body Green

  • http://twitter.com/MommyMomentBlog Mommy Momentâ„¢

    AMEN!!! I will be sharing your post as it is 100% in line with what I believe :) Cheers.

  • http://twitter.com/LeiGry Lei

    A whole lot of yes! And I’m with you about “chubby chaser”. Hate it! We get the labels cause we’re not the “Ideal”

  • April

    Great post Jen. All fat girls aren’t depressed and sitting at home eating cookies and lamenting their life. Many of us are strong, and vibrant, and beautiful and EXACTLY who we’re meant to be. I’m so tired of people judging me based on the body that I carry. I also personally love when people meet my husband for the first time and then question “how I managed to land him”. Ya know, I’m overweight so I obviously have no value whatsoever. Bah. Yes, my bodybuilder husband married me because of WHO I AM, and not because of what I look like. I’m an amazing person .. size 8 or size 20. Don’t like it, that’s your issue, not mine.