Interview- How to Leave an Abusive Relationship

Last week, I was on Breakfast Television talking about my latest blog post—How to Leave an Abusive Relationship.

 

TV interview on how to leave an abusive relationship

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How to Leave an Abusive Relationship

Leaving an abusive relationship

Today, December 20th, 2014 is a day I’ll never forget. Today is the day that I found finalized divorce papers in my mailbox. Some would find this heartbreaking, but I feel relieved, happy, and finally in control of my life. For the first time in 16 years, I feel free.

I never thought I would get here. I tried many times to get out of my abusive marriage, but always took him back. He constantly told me I couldn’t do it on my own. I couldn’t look after two very young children and myself. I wasn’t strong enough or smart enough and I needed him. He threatened me by saying that he would take my kids away and that no court would let me keep them because I didn’t have financial backing from family members. He was wrong on all accounts. I was strong enough, I was smart enough, and I didn’t need financial backing. I just needed a plan.

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My Priceless Trip to New York

Quote at the MasterCard tech hub.

A couple of weeks ago, I was approached by a Canadian PR company asking me if I would be interested in checking out MasterCard’s new Tech Hub in Manhattan. As soon as I read the email, my eyes got crazy big and my heart started to flutter. Could you image? Two of my favourite things – technology and New York City together, could anything be more exciting?

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Finding Clarity in Flood Waters

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My normal routine is: get up, put robe on, let dog out, make breakfasts/lunches and then go downstairs to shower.  On this Monday morning, I walked down the stairs and stepped into a giant puddle of water a couple of inches deep. There was water EVERYWHERE.

My basement was flooded.

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I don’t have the energy to be my worst enemy anymore.

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A couple of weeks after I asked my husband to leave, I had an Akashic reading with my friend Tara.

As she entered my home, she said I needed to slow down. She had been in-tune with my energy for hours and my anxiety was forcing her to clean. That’s the fun thing about my anxiety, I clean until I can’t clean any more and then clean again. It’s easier for me to move my hands than listen to my thoughts.

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My Birthday Present To Myself

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Birthdays have a huge significance to me. It’s how I see the start to a new year. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll drink Prosecco and hang out with my kids or chill with my friends on New Year’s Eve, but it just doesn’t feel like a big shift for me. Not like my birthday does.

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Let’s End Domestic Violence

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I used to think that women in abusive relationships were covered in bruises, scratches, and welts. They were weak, scared, and shook a lot. At least that’s what my mom looked like to me when I was a child.

I always told myself I would NEVER end up in an abusive relationship like my mother. I’m too strong, too independent, and too wise beyond my years. I’d never let a man treat me like that.

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How Frozen Helped Me Love Myself More

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Frozen: the movie I’ve seen at least 30 times and the soundtrack plays non-stop when my girls are in the car. Let’s just say I can bust out any Frozen song on cue and I’ve made my own Do You Want to Build a Snowman words including: “Do you want to poke your eyes out? Or maybe slit your wrists?”.

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Has It Really Been A Year?

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Most of the time, when bloggers put up a post after a long delay, they start off by apologizing. This isn’t something I am going to do. In fact, I’m proud of myself for not posting. Weird, I know.

A year ago today, I asked my husband to leave myself and the girls. Our life together wasn’t making either of us happy and it was starting to affect the kids. Even at the young age of one and four, the girls were fully aware of being in a home without joy. As much as I tried to make life great for them and myself, it become very clear that you can’t fool anyone. You can’t fool your kids, friends, family and certainly not your own mind. On March 27th, 2013 I decided to make myself a priority and this took a lot of change. A LOT of change.

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I’m Independently Awesome

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I took down my online dating profiles last week. Did I meet someone? Well, I met a lot of people, but no, I’m still single.

The past 5 months have been hilarious, sad, fun and frustrating at the same time. In the beginning, I was beyond flattered that I was getting messages and that men were interested in me at all. Even the 25 year-old with MILF fantasies.

I went out on dates and they were always entertaining.

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